hmmmm!

How weird!

I called into work today because being so upset yesterday about work gave me a serious headache and my stomach is all upset.

But anyway so once I felt a little better I started watching a little TV. And I found and egg donation story line on "As the world turns". It kinda helps to think I am not the only one, but heck its fiction. So no it really doesn't.

But in a way it is nice to see that people think about me and others having this problem and integrate it into stories that are being shown on TV. It does kinda feel good.

But I still feel I am the only one in the world. And that I did something wrong in my life to deserve this. I have doubts about this lately and about everything else in my life.

I am not sure if I have ever been this unhappy. I feel like I am at a dead end and do not know how to continue from here......with the rest of my life.

Heck all I ever wanted was a man that loves me, kids and a house........and to be happy or at least content.

Ahhhh....crap I hate feeling depressed.

So here I go putting my smile back on and keep on trucking.........