Happy New Year

So her I am waiting for 2008.

And I am soo tired because I have not been sleeping well the past two nights.

But hey I can sleep when I am 80.

This is the first time in 10 years that I will spend New Years Eve by myself.

And I thought it would depress me...plus I have PMS

BUT

no I am okay....I am in a very good mood today. Enjoyed my relaxing acupuncture treatment and decided not to do anything tonight. Got me a small bottle of champagne

and am gonna have one or two glasses.

And I am not gonna make any new years resolutions like I do every year.

Hey I survived 1 year and 4 months of infertility drama, I survived my first Christmas in 10 years by myself.

And I am not miserable.....I AM JUST FINE...

And the other day while driving (that is when I do all my thinking) I thought how truly well I am doing and how strong I am. I had underestimated myself. I must say I am actually impressed with myself. I am dealing, I am coping and I am really doing fine.

I Thought I was gonna crumble and crash over Christmas.

But I did more than okay.

I can do this .....AND I AM NOT GIVING UP.

I am gonna enter into a new year with new hopes and new dreams. I am gonna have a life again, I am not gonna put my life on hold....I am gonna lead a normal life.

or at least I am gonna try my hardest.

I am gonna be okay....and today I felt almost happy for a while.

I am good....I am okay.

Happy New Year!!!!